James 1:1-8,12
James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ,
To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations:
Greetings.2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. 4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.
Let's talk about perseverance. If you've followed my blogs at all, you've probably picked up on my obsession with one statistic, and that is that only 3 out of 10 kids from the youth group will follow Christ after graduating. If you have worked with youth or at least been a casual observer of teens in the Church, you probably would concur with that statistic. I would call the 3 that remain - perseverers or as James would say, those with perseverance. Unlike the seed that is planted on rocky soil and burns out when trials come, these teens have faced the trials of persecution for their faith, loss of popularity, not getting invited to parties, and the attack on their faith, especially the Bible, by professors - and have persevered through it all. What can we learn about them from this passage and what tips can we learn about how to raise kids that persevere? Or, on a personal level, how can you be a person who lasts in your faith until the end when the Lord says, Well done my good and faithful servant. Enter into the kingdom I've prepared for you." ?
I think the key is found at the end of verse 12,"to those who love him". Perseverance comes on the front end. If a love relationship develops between you or the student with Christ, perseverance has a much greater chance of occurring. For example, if you go through a trial as a result of becoming a Christian, you are much more likely to just give up Christianity than endure the trial if you are just following a belief set than if you are following a "person" who you love. A person is much more difficult to give up on than an intellectual belief. Or if you lack wisdom - let's say someone says "How can you believe in a loving God who sends everyone who doesn't bow their knee to him to Hell?" If you lack wisdom, yet believe in and love God, yet don't have all the answers, you ask the Lord for answers and until you gain that wisdom, because you love Him, you trust He knows what He is doing. If you don't know Him or love Him but are just following an intellectual belief, you will begin wavering and becoming double minded and losing bits and pieces of your faith until it's all gone.
As I write this, I think of a young Christian couple, who I had to tell them that there is no heartbeat in their pregnancy and they are going to have a miscarriage. Now the question could be, "God, if children are a gift from You and you are a God of love, Why did You put a baby inside of us only to die? That seems awfully cruel!" It's not wrong to ask that question but a person who has a relationship with God and loves Him will end up saying, "I don't understand but I trust that when I see you someday You will put your arms around me, grieve with me and help me to understand." Someone who has just accepted Christianity as a belief will start losing faith and start becoming double-minded.
Let's say the police stop at my door and ask where my wife is because she stole a package from Amazon off a neighbor's porch. Although I could see myself doing that, I know my wife and could tell the officer that he or she has the wrong person. My wife would never do that. Because I know her and have had a relationship with her, wheras all the neighborhood would believe the officer because they don't know her, I would stand with her. Let's say the officer says, "I have a security camera footage showing her taking it", I would still say, "It's someone who looks like her, but not her". Let's say they showed it to me and it is indeed her. Because I love her, I would say, "Well, I'm sure she had a good reason" and continue to support her. Why? Because I've developed a 38 year relationship with her where I know her and love her and believe in her. It's not because I believe in our marriage, family, reputation, etc. that I'm defending her and trying to hang on to those. It's because I believe in her.
In my own life, growing up in a Christian family, a belief in God was instilled in me in an early age. We have tried and I would say succeeded in doing that with our 4 kids also. As my kids would say to my wife,"Mom, you see Jesus in everything!", which may have been singing her praises or exasperated cries but nonetheless illustrate the point. For me to have rejected Christianity would have been like me saying, "God, I don't believe in You anymore! Please don't be mad at me." You see, I couldn't reject Christianity because it was a "person" who I rejecting. I can't even say I really loved God till much later in my life but I did know Him, believe in Him and was developing a relationship with Him.
So what can you do with your kids? When they sin, don't say, "You sinned", or "The Bible says you shouldn't do that". Say instead, "That made Jesus sad". When you pray, get past the "Now I lay me down..." prayers and the "God is great..." prayers but say "Let's talk to Jesus..." When you see answers to prayer or God moving, point it out to the kids. Like my wife, see God in everything! As I write this, Christmas is coming. Why not wrap Jesus a present and have a birthday party for Him. It is a lot harder to give up on a person than an intellectual belief.
