Romans 12:17-21
Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”
21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.
I had a weird dream the other night. Karen and I were sitting at some kind of show that bus loads of retired people go to which starts with a buffet and ends with someone singing a patriotic song. We were sitting side by side in movie seats and there was a guy sitting next to Karen who was drunk and kept trying to hit on her. I leaned over and told him to stop, she is married and belongs to me. Pretty soon he put his arm around her. She quickly removed it and we got up to change seats or leave. (hopefully leave) As we walked away he called me a wimp for walking away and not defending my wife's honor. It is at this point I woke up. Weird dream, huh. Where are Joseph and Daniel when you need them? What should I have done? Should I have told him to come outside and we will settle it? Should I have made a witty comeback like, "I know you are". Should I just have ignored him and walked away? I related this dream to Karen and asked what I should have done - what would she want me to do in that situation. Her responses was, "that's a stupid dream". A lot of help that was! I have had real life situations growing up in my teen years with real life bullies who if I had stood up to and fought with them I would have gotten trounced but I would have had some degree of integrity for standing up against evil and not walking away.
It is interesting that almost every Christian you talk to would tell their kids to stand up to bullies. They want their young boys to grow up to be "men". I just don't see that in the Bible. It flies completely in the face of this passage or Jesus' teachings. I'm not saying that we shouldn't stand up for someone else getting picked on but are we really to fight back when we are personally picked on? I grew up in a strong Bible church and even memorized these verses. I have to believe that I was trying to honor God with not retaliating although truly it could have been fear - I don't know. I remember my hero who was a Christian and star tackle on the High School football team relating that someone was trying to pick a fight with him and he said "I could tear you apart but because I am a Christian I won't fight you." That is much more pride salvaging and noble than to say, "You would probably tear me apart but because I'm a Christian, I won't fight you."
Why do we retaliate - generally because our pride has been affronted. If it is in public especially, all the people that witness it think that you are a coward. We worry about what would people think of us. It puts that person, in the world's eyes above us in a pecking order. As a side note, there is a pecking order in life - it is understood yet not clearly stated and is under the surface. A direct confrontation brings this pecking order to the surface. Therefore the question is, can you, can I, in lieu of grace, knowing that we have been adopted into God's family, we are sons of God, we have eternal life, God couldn't love us anymore or less, we have a family of brothers and sisters in Christ who love us unconditionally - can you or I ignore the affronts to our dignity or pride sent to us by Satan and those who are blindly under his control and rest in our grace? Can we pray for those people and do kind things to them instead, even though observers would think that those kind things are extortion payments or bribes to leave us alone? Do we feel sorry for these people who have never experienced God's grace or do we wish evil on them? Do we trust God enough to let him deal with our enemies and stand up for us? Do we have a close enough relationship with Him that we know, no matter what people think of us, God loves us and is weeping over the situation? Have you allowed the situation to drive you to God and grow that relationship?
Lord, I do want to stand up for myself and retaliate and get revenge when people wrong me. Help me to find my worth in You and see these people through Your eyes. You aren't willing that any should perish. Help me to love my enemies like Jesus did who came to this Earth and was bullied yet didn't retaliate. Amen
I had a weird dream the other night. Karen and I were sitting at some kind of show that bus loads of retired people go to which starts with a buffet and ends with someone singing a patriotic song. We were sitting side by side in movie seats and there was a guy sitting next to Karen who was drunk and kept trying to hit on her. I leaned over and told him to stop, she is married and belongs to me. Pretty soon he put his arm around her. She quickly removed it and we got up to change seats or leave. (hopefully leave) As we walked away he called me a wimp for walking away and not defending my wife's honor. It is at this point I woke up. Weird dream, huh. Where are Joseph and Daniel when you need them? What should I have done? Should I have told him to come outside and we will settle it? Should I have made a witty comeback like, "I know you are". Should I just have ignored him and walked away? I related this dream to Karen and asked what I should have done - what would she want me to do in that situation. Her responses was, "that's a stupid dream". A lot of help that was! I have had real life situations growing up in my teen years with real life bullies who if I had stood up to and fought with them I would have gotten trounced but I would have had some degree of integrity for standing up against evil and not walking away.
It is interesting that almost every Christian you talk to would tell their kids to stand up to bullies. They want their young boys to grow up to be "men". I just don't see that in the Bible. It flies completely in the face of this passage or Jesus' teachings. I'm not saying that we shouldn't stand up for someone else getting picked on but are we really to fight back when we are personally picked on? I grew up in a strong Bible church and even memorized these verses. I have to believe that I was trying to honor God with not retaliating although truly it could have been fear - I don't know. I remember my hero who was a Christian and star tackle on the High School football team relating that someone was trying to pick a fight with him and he said "I could tear you apart but because I am a Christian I won't fight you." That is much more pride salvaging and noble than to say, "You would probably tear me apart but because I'm a Christian, I won't fight you."
Why do we retaliate - generally because our pride has been affronted. If it is in public especially, all the people that witness it think that you are a coward. We worry about what would people think of us. It puts that person, in the world's eyes above us in a pecking order. As a side note, there is a pecking order in life - it is understood yet not clearly stated and is under the surface. A direct confrontation brings this pecking order to the surface. Therefore the question is, can you, can I, in lieu of grace, knowing that we have been adopted into God's family, we are sons of God, we have eternal life, God couldn't love us anymore or less, we have a family of brothers and sisters in Christ who love us unconditionally - can you or I ignore the affronts to our dignity or pride sent to us by Satan and those who are blindly under his control and rest in our grace? Can we pray for those people and do kind things to them instead, even though observers would think that those kind things are extortion payments or bribes to leave us alone? Do we feel sorry for these people who have never experienced God's grace or do we wish evil on them? Do we trust God enough to let him deal with our enemies and stand up for us? Do we have a close enough relationship with Him that we know, no matter what people think of us, God loves us and is weeping over the situation? Have you allowed the situation to drive you to God and grow that relationship?
Lord, I do want to stand up for myself and retaliate and get revenge when people wrong me. Help me to find my worth in You and see these people through Your eyes. You aren't willing that any should perish. Help me to love my enemies like Jesus did who came to this Earth and was bullied yet didn't retaliate. Amen
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